I dont wanna live but i dont wanna die

Theodora Blanchfield is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist and mental health writer using her experiences to help others.

Home Mental Health Information. Does this thought feel familiar? If so, you are not alone. Many people who struggle with their mental health have experienced similar thoughts and feelings. Not everyone who thinks about dying wants to die.

I dont wanna live but i dont wanna die

Content created for the Bezzy community and sponsored by our partners. Learn More. Medically Reviewed by:. I typed this into Google a year ago, my hands shaking as I questioned what I meant. I felt selfish as I typed it, thinking about all of the people who had been suicidal, worrying that I was being disrespectful to those who had actually lost their lives that way. I also wondered whether I was just being dramatic. But I pressed enter anyway, desperate to find an answer to what I was feeling. To my surprise, I was met with search after search of the exact same question. There were so many other people feeling the exact same way. If you or someone you know is considering suicide, help is out there. Reach out to the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by dialing The Lifeline is a national network of local crisis centers that provides free, confidential support for people in distress, crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals in the United States. If someone is at immediate risk of self-harm, call or your local emergency number and stay with them until help arrives.

If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call Mental health professionals sometimes use a tool called the "Reasons for Living Inventory" to assess for suicidality, but you might also want to look at it on your own to begin to jog your memory of reasons you want to live. You may be feeling desperate right now, but there are a number of things you can do, such as therapy, reaching out to your social support network, and safety planning.

In my experience, these are different levels of depression. The 12 Steps are nice and all, and they keep me sober, but I suffered from deep depression and suicidal thoughts since I was a child—this is clinical depression that only medication can address usually. The first level of depression has nothing to do with actually dying. Unconsciousness is bliss to someone who finds the waking world miserable. This is why you see many successful people commit suicide despite having lives most of us dream of. People like Philip Seymour Hoffman and Chester Bennington had lives many people would literally kill for, and yet they killed themselves. Incidentally, drinking to blackout or shooting opiates until you pass out is another form of non-existence that has nothing to do with death.

Daniel B. Block, MD, is an award-winning, board-certified psychiatrist who operates a private practice in Pennsylvania. Information in this article might be triggering to some people. If you are having suicidal thoughts, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at for support and assistance from a trained counselor. If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call For more mental health resources, see our National Helpline Database. Wanting to give up on life can be a fleeting feeling, but it can also be a precursor to suicide. With the proper treatment and support, your will to live again can return.

I dont wanna live but i dont wanna die

Trigger warning: This post contains a frank discussion of suicide pertaining to feeling semi-suicidal. September is Suicide Awareness Month, and in honor of that, I want to share my experience with feeling semi-suicidal. My hope is that other people who have occupied this awful in-between space will understand that what they're going through is very real, and someone else has been there too. Over the last six years, I've been semi-suicidal many times. Semi-suicidal is a state of being where you may experience suicidal thoughts or feelings , but don't necessarily want to die.

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Reply to Adam Fout. Not giving any thoughts to what I may need or how I may feel about something. If someone asks about something then there are infinite answers. I was going to be a writer, in my younger days, but my depression, killed it dead. At the end of my rope, I turned to Google. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. Fortunately I failed. But I pressed enter anyway, desperate to find an answer to what I was feeling. Change medications. Thank you and I promise to update you all when I get better and I hope you all will do the same. Christian Footman.

If you experience suicidal thoughts, the following post could be potentially triggering. That is the classic thought of someone living with passive suicidal ideation.

Because I would imagine a creator who was at a time alone the only show in town so to say and created everything to know something of loneliness. Not sure what to do. Learn about our Medical Review Board. Now, my children are getting hurt. She hated me she hated my life my profession and I had no friends besides my relationship with her I left my life as a healer as a father with two beautiful children to be with this self absorbed bitch who once wrote a page diary to do nothing but complain about me. We use cookies on our website to give you a quality experience. Now that that had been taken away, everything seemed new and exciting. And that thought makes me feel like I can never give a good or right answer. Next Article. I have wanted, on and off, to not exist since I was about 9 years old. I used to get really angry about it. The Lifeline is a national network of local crisis centers that provides free, confidential support for people in distress, crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals in the United States. If you or a loved one are in immediate danger, call I always wanted to return to my childhood. My little angel Juniper my little grandaughter has stolen my heart and moved to Costa Rica.